For those who woke up on Wednesday feeling ill, heartbroken, and upset about the reality that hatred seems accepted by many Americans, it’s understandable to feel a sense of hopelessness. The worries about racism, misogyny, and the dehumanization that many face each day can be overwhelming.

While we can’t change this reality, we can choose not to become part of it.

Recently, many have heard about how Jason Kelce confronted a man who hurled a homophobic slur at his brother during the Ohio State-Penn State game last Saturday, even going as far as breaking the man’s phone. Kelce also repeated the slur himself in the heated moment.

Kelce has since apologized, first during an ESPN segment on Monday night and again on his podcast with brother Travis that went live on Wednesday. Acknowledging the anger that led to his outburst, he emphasized that reacting with hate is never the right approach.

“I reacted to hate with hate, and I don’t believe that’s a productive way to handle things. Truly, it doesn’t lead to meaningful conversations and isn’t the appropriate method to move forward,” Kelce stated ahead of the Monday night game between the Kansas City Chiefs and Tampa Bay Buccaneers. “In that moment, I lowered myself to a level I shouldn’t have.”

Many of us can empathize, as we have all had moments where we lost our temper and muttered things we later regretted. Most people have supported Kelce, recognizing that he was provoked by someone who crossed a line and that this heckler was likely seeking attention from Kelce’s reaction.

Yet, we must strive to do better. All of us.

When we stoop to the level of those who promote hate, we do not change their minds. Instead, we may be reinforcing their beliefs, especially considering that over 70 million Americans still voted to re-elect Donald Trump despite clear evidence of his racist and misogynistic behavior.

What we do change is ourselves. By lowering our standards, we lose a piece of our own humanity.

“I aim to live by the Golden Rule, as I’ve always been taught,” Kelce reflected. “I strive to treat people with respect and decency, and I will continue to do so, even after I faltered this week.”

This doesn’t mean we should tolerate offensive remarks or the oppression of marginalized groups. Nor does it imply we have to accept cruelty. Quite the opposite—it’s essential to stand firmly against injustice and to condemn anyone who vilifies Black and brown communities, immigrants, women, and the LGBTQ individuals.

However, we can oppose this negativity without lowering our own dignity.

If we want to steer this nation back onto a positive course, and create a society that treats everyone with fairness and honor, we must begin with our own behavior.

“What I regret the most is saying that word, to be honest. The slur was completely absurd, crossing a significant line and dehumanizing. It truly bothered me and prompted a strong reaction,” Kelce shared in his podcast. “Now, there’s a video online of me and him repeating that hateful word, and that’s harmful for everyone involved.”

“What I regret is the existence of this hateful video, now seen by millions. I bear some responsibility for its circulation,” Kelce added.

As many of us feel a sense of despair today, it’s crucial to remember that hate has never brought about positive outcomes. Allow yourself to feel angry, sad, confused, or even hopeless, but don’t become what you are resisting; do not accept what you know is wrong.

Ultimately, the impact goes beyond just a lost election.