Modern Mormons are opening up about sex. Can they navigate reality TV?
A scandal involving swinging. An arrest. A pregnancy. A birth.
This is just a glimpse into a woman’s experience in “The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives” (now on Hulu), an engaging new eight-episode reality show that mixes elements from “Gossip Girl,” “The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City,” and “Mean Girls” into a compellingly chaotic mix. In simpler terms, I watched it all in less than 24 hours. Absolutely delightful!
The show features eight influencers from Mormon “#MomTok” – Taylor Frankie Paul, Demi Engemann, Jennifer Affleck, Jessi Ngatikaura, Layla Taylor, Mayci Neeley, Mikayla Matthews, and Whitney Leavitt. Many of these women financially support their families through their TikTok fame. However, it was Taylor’s revelation of her participation in “soft-swinging” – limited sexual exchanges with other couples – that placed the group in the limelight.
Yet, “Mormon Wives” is not predominantly about swinging. At its core, it dives into themes of friendship, faith, betrayal, manipulation, infidelity, and vacations – reminiscent of a classic season of “Real Housewives.”
This may explain why the show resonates so well; it doesn’t reinvent reality TV. Instead, it dresses it up in a fresh, binge-ready package, serving as a cautionary tale for viewers.
How ‘Mormon Wives’ Challenge the Patriarchy
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has made numerous appearances in television and pop culture, from “My Husband’s Not Gay” to “Big Love” to “Real Housewives.” However, this show seeks to carve a new path, giving young Mormon women in their 20s and 30s the chance to express their views on sex without being submissive to their partners.
“Mormon Wives” highlights how these women respond to patriarchal norms. They are unreserved when discussing topics like sex, bodies, and pleasure. They embrace conversations about divorce, with one woman even hosting a divorce party. They speak candidly about cosmetic surgeries, Botox, and therapy. Additionally, they address serious matters like physical and emotional abuse.
Still, plenty of drama arises from typical reality show conflicts. Some quarrels are trivial; factions form between “sinners” and “saints” as differing religious commitments emerge, and melodramatic music accompanies discussions about group chats. Yet, some issues take on a more serious tone. Viewers witness firsthand as one woman behaves differently with her friends compared to her spouse, showcasing troubling misogyny. It can be quite unsettling.
Such moments reinforce the show’s importance. Watching a group of real Mormon women confront a friend about her husband’s behavior is something we wouldn’t have seen on television a decade ago. Amidst all the tantalizing drama, a significant truth manages to shine through: when male behavior becomes abusive, it’s clear to the women and viewers alike.
The Reality Behind ‘Guilty Pleasure’ TV
No television show can entirely capture the essence of a specific community. However, “Mormon Wives” uncovers hidden layers within this group of women. Embracing church life and motherhood is fine, just as discussing intimate subjects while being a devout mother doesn’t diminish those roles.
It’s unclear how audiences will respond to the series. Some Christians may disagree with the portrayals of these women; others might find their stories relatable and appreciate their openness. Many viewers might skip it entirely based on the premise, while some could dismiss it as a typical “guilty pleasure” that plays in the background while they cook.
The great thing about “guilty pleasure” programming is that you really don’t need to feel guilty. You find enjoyment in it simply because you do. Whether you perceive it as an escape or a source of reflection is irrelevant; what’s significant is that you allow yourself to contemplate authentic human experiences.
Considering the balance of lightheartedness and serious themes, I encourage you to give it a chance. You might even uncover some of your own hidden truths.