KEOTA, Iowa ― The couple’s farm near this southeastern Iowa town is now a place filled with painful memories. The damaged furniture and the holes in the walls constantly remind her of his violent outbursts.

In October 2022, Christopher Wulf once set a timer and told his wife, Jordan, she had 15 minutes to confess to affairs which she denies ever occurred, or he would take her life that day. As the timer counted down, she panicked and claimed she would always stand by him in an effort to avoid danger. However, she reported that he choked her until she became unconscious.

The following evening, she recounted being beaten on the porch, with him attempting to drag her toward a machine shed while carrying an AR-15 over his shoulder. To buy herself some time, she claimed she would confess to everything horrific, hoping they could start anew. But she felt overwhelmed and asked for 15 minutes alone. As he waited outside, she went to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water.

Once she confirmed through a window that he wasn’t watching, she secretly dialed 911 and quietly informed the dispatcher that her life was in danger. Then, she hurried upstairs with her three boys, waiting until help arrived.

The accounts of violence that Jordan Wulf, 42, revealed to therapists left them in tears. After her husband Christopher was sentenced this spring for kidnapping with a dangerous weapon, domestic abuse, and willful injury, she felt a drive to help other victims like herself on their paths to recovery and new beginnings.

Jordan found motivation in a Change.org petition initiated in late July, advocating for changes in Iowa law to make the divorce process quicker for domestic violence victims. With growing support, she has gained over 3,500 signatures towards her target of 5,000 by October, in observance of Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

Christopher Wulf is serving a 25-year prison sentence, with a minimum of 17 years before eligibility for parole. Still, Jordan feels trapped, burdened by the mortgage and existing bills tied to the house where she suffered. Only once her divorce is finalized next year can she and her children truly heal.

“If a woman was attacked by a stranger, should she have to spend the following two years where it all happened?” she questioned. “I’m forced to sleep in a bed we shared, I can’t secure a loan to repair the damage he caused, and I can’t sell our home until the divorce is complete.”

Although not all law enforcement agencies in Iowa submit Uniform Crime Data to the state’s Department of Public Safety, those that do reported eight domestic violence homicides last year, the highest number in five years.

Jordan Wulf’s experience struck a chord with former state Rep. Jarad Klein, who chaired the Public Safety Committee in the Iowa Legislature and has known her for years. Klein, a Republican who served for 12 years before resigning in 2023, expressed his intention to connect Jordan with current lawmakers to explore the possibility of a focused bill in the upcoming legislative session.

Given the severity of what she endured, he remarked, “it’s hard to understand why this is an ongoing issue.”

“The positive aspect is she is speaking out, and there’s a strong support network behind her,” he noted. “I want to provide legislators with the opportunity to discuss this with courts, prosecutors, and experts in divorce law,” he added regarding her advocacy.

However, while Jordan’s proposal seems beneficial at first glance, experts have indicated that the reality is more complex. Domestic violence inherently involves issues of power and control, and pushing for a faster divorce may result in victims surrendering some of their legal rights. Legislators must navigate balancing new reforms with preserving the due process rights of the accused.

Criminal case delays divorce proceedings, but the bills keep coming

Jordan Wulf mentioned that she initiated divorce proceedings in December 2022, but her first court hearing is not scheduled until March 2025. The delay was largely due to her attorney, Rachael Neff, recommending that they wait until her husband’s sentencing was concluded.

Neff explained, “We needed a resolution in his criminal case so the divorce court could assess and establish suitable custody arrangements.”

Christopher Wulf’s criminal hearings and trial, initially set for March 2023, experienced numerous postponements caused by requests from his attorney, Eric Tindal, as indicated by court documents. Tindal did not respond to calls seeking his remarks on the case.

In early 2024, Christopher Wulf declined a plea deal but accepted a different one in the last week of March, just before he was scheduled to stand trial, according to court records.

Shortly after this development, Jordan Wulf and her attorney drafted a proposed divorce settlement and sent it to Christopher Wulf’s lawyer on April 15. The response from her husband’s attorney arrived in June, after he managed to meet with Christopher in prison. The proposal included a request for the transfer of Christopher Wulf’s firearms to his father since he is no longer permitted to possess guns.

Due to this and other considerations, Jordan Wulf decided to reject the offer.

As she anticipates a ruling from the judge regarding her marriage dissolution next spring, Jordan Wulf has been managing the mortgage and shared debts, unable to fully move on from the difficulties stemming from her 19 years of marriage.

“Living on this property is extremely costly. However, the (divorce hearing) has been repeatedly postponed,” she expressed.

Iowans can get emergency divorces — but there are catches

Jordan Wulf, along with others in Iowa, has the possibility to file for an emergency divorce, as reported by Watchdog.

A relatively recent statute added to chapter 598.19 by lawmakers in 2019 permits individuals in a divorce to specify reasons for an emergency divorce, allowing them to bypass the usual 90-day waiting period before a divorce is finalized.

According to the revised statute: “The court may, at its discretion, hold a hearing and grant a decree to dissolve the marriage before the waiting period expires if a written motion is supported by an affidavit that outlines the grounds for emergency or necessity and demonstrates immediate action is required to safeguard the rights or interests of any party impacted by the decree.”

However, Kirsten Faisal, director of training and technical assistance for the Iowa Coalition Against Domestic Violence, stated that she is unaware of emergency dissolutions being widely utilized in cases of domestic violence. Such cases tend to be complex and lengthy, particularly when children are involved.

“Judges would be eager to conclude these cases within 90 days,” she mentioned in an email. “The delays stem from the manipulative tactics used by the abuser, not the legal waiting period. Disputes over various issues, using children as leverage, and attempting to exhaust the victim’s resources by prolonging proceedings contribute significantly to the drawn-out nature of these cases.”

Faisal added that divorce does not necessarily put an end to domestic violence for many survivors.

“Ending a relationship and ceasing the abuse are two separate matters. Co-parenting with an abusive ex can complicate things further. Additionally, separation can heighten the severity of abuse and risk of lethality,” she noted.

Faisal believes Jordan Wulf should qualify for an expedited divorce under Iowa law, regardless of whether Christopher Wulf agrees.

“The law does not stipulate that both parties must consent for an emergency dissolution,” she clarified. “As I interpret it, the decision lies within the judge’s discretion. This situation appears to be an ideal candidate for that process.”

Quicker resolution could lead to bad terms for abuse survivor, lawyer warns

Nonetheless, Alex Kornya, the outgoing litigation director for Iowa Legal Aid, indicated that disputes often cause divorce proceedings to extend well beyond 90 days, due to scheduling for trials and civil procedural timelines.

“The challenge in (Wulf’s) case isn’t the 90-day waiting period; it’s the congested court schedules,” he stated. “Waiving the waiting时间

The waiting period is only effective if all parties involved agree, which is quite unusual in cases of domestic violence.

“My instincts suggest that in serious cases of domestic violence, if both parties are in agreement, we should question the conditions. Is the survivor being compromised? Is there any pressure leading to favorable terms for the abuser? In some instances, yes; in others, that may not be the case.”

A lawyer aims to offer comprehensive insights regarding risks and advantages, ultimately leaving the final choice to the client. “Some clients prioritize breaking off the relationship and understand the safety implications it entails, even over potential concerns.”

However, unfavorable terms can also pose safety risks if they allow an abuser to maintain control over the survivor through an enforceable court order, he pointed out.

“In contentious cases, more than 90 days may be necessary just to build the case. The discovery process can stretch for months, especially since abusers may be more likely to withhold or distort information, given their tendency to seek control. For example, they might have managed the finances during the marriage or accumulated debts that their partner is unaware of.”

He noted that an expedited divorce could be exploited by an abuser to obstruct a thorough examination of financial matters and other details during the discovery phase.

Anjie Schutts, a family law attorney with nearly three decades of experience in Des Moines, mentioned that judges in Iowa are overwhelmed and have limited time.

She advises her clients that emergency divorces generally happen only if both parties can agree on all matters. Additionally, she cautions against hastily pursuing a divorce since financial disclosures are time-consuming, which could result in losses in the long run.

Neff stated that the parties could come to an agreement before the divorce hearing scheduled for next spring, but if they cannot, the case will need to go to trial.

Escalating Threats Throughout a Violent Marriage

Wulf recounted that her husband’s jealousy and controlling nature were evident before they were married at 19, although she was too young to recognize it as a warning sign. This behavior intensified throughout their marriage.

She accused him of pushing her down a staircase while she was pregnant with their second child. Later, she said he began to hit her with different objects—broomsticks, hammers, and even guns—and frequently choked her.

In March 2022, concerned for her safety, Wulf’s mother requested police to perform a welfare check at their farm near the village of West Chester, close to Keota. Wulf stated she lied to the officers and claimed she was fine, despite enduring routine beatings.

The series of events that led to her husband’s arrest in October 2022 started 11 days before she discreetly contacted the police. He had successfully isolated her from her family, and she had stopped going to her job at a Coralville nursing home due to a black eye he had given her.

“At that point, my only goal was to survive and make sure he did not kill me,” she recalled.

On the night he attempted to drag her to the machine shed with a gun, she realized that if she didn’t intervene, she wouldn’t survive. She is convinced the 911 call was her lifeline.

Before police arrived, Christopher Wulf fled the scene. He bombarded her and their children with calls and texts. She eventually persuaded him to surrender to the authorities two days later, assuring him they would face the forthcoming legal consequences together.

Even after his incarceration and with Jordan Wulf under a restraining order, he still tried desperately to contact her through his mother, which led to his conviction for contempt of court.

During the victim impact statement she read at his sentencing, Jordan Wulf finally shared her truth: The fear of him harming their children as he had harmed her had consumed her—until it no longer did.

“The only other truthful thing you ever told me was when you claimed that no one would ever love me like you do,” she expressed to him. “To that, I can only say THANK GOD. I do not deserve that kind of ‘love,’ as it isn’t love at all. I deserve respect, honesty, compassion, and kindness.”

How to Seek Support If Experiencing Domestic Violence

According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, approximately 41% of women and 26% of men have endured contact sexual violence, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner during their lifetime, which had notable effects on their lives.

If you or someone you know requires immediate support, please contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or text “START” to 88788. A chat option is also available