The passing of President Jimmy Carter on Sunday came as both a surprise and an anticipated reality. After nearly two years in hospice care, he reached the milestone age of 100 in October, fulfilling the chance to vote for Vice President Kamala Harris in the recent presidential elections.

As one user on X said, “It’s hard to find another American who has contributed as much to our country and to humanity.” Another commented, “I’m deeply saddened by the loss of President Jimmy Carter. May he find peace.”

The announcement of his death has resonated deeply with many, making the loss feel intimate. Whether he was in office at your birth or your parents’, you might recognize his humanitarian efforts through The Carter Center or his collaboration with Habitat for Humanity. Whatever the connection, feelings of grief are likely being felt.

Everyone experiences grief differently, and experts note that mourning someone you didn’t personally know—termed collective or public grief—can be a complex yet legitimate feeling.

David Kessler, a grief specialist and founder of Grief.com, previously explained to YSL News, “Collective and public grief possess a unique way of connecting us to others.”

When a beloved public figure passes away, this type of grief can intensify.

Shavonne Moore-Lobban, a licensed psychologist, stated earlier to YSL News, “With unexpected losses, people often experience shock, disbelief, confusion, and denial. The sudden nature of the loss can be overwhelming and difficult to comprehend.”

Understanding our connection to public figures

Moore-Lobban added, “Sudden losses can hit harder, leaving people feeling less prepared compared to when loss is anticipated. Yet, it’s challenging to be ready for any significant life-change, regardless of prior knowledge.”

Many individuals develop parasocial relationships with celebrities, politicians, or newscasters—leading to feelings of closeness as if they were friends or family.

Even if collective or public grief differs from grieving someone personally close, it still holds genuine importance.

Kessler remarked, “It’s intriguing that people often don’t realize they can grieve for individuals they have never met. Our emotions won’t mirror the grief we feel for a spouse or family member, but we still grieve nonetheless.”

Supporting those in grief

When comforting someone who is grieving, avoid downplaying their feelings or suggesting a deadline for their sorrow.

Moore-Lobban explains, “Grief knows no boundaries, and it’s an ongoing process that will unfold as long as needed for each individual experiencing it.”

If you are mourning, it’s beneficial to discuss your feelings. This could mean confiding in a trusted person about your emotions. Additionally, seeking therapy, whether one-on-one or in a group, may also help. Writing in a journal to express feelings can be another valuable outlet.

The loss of significant public figures may also prompt broader conversations about grief.

Kessler concluded, “As a society, we have an ambiguous relationship with death. While we all understand, conceptually, that everyone will eventually die, we struggle with how to approach this reality—in fear or finding comfort?”