In a college football game last month, the fierce competitive spirit among opponents was evident as it spilled onto the field, resulting in eight altercations after the matches.

Some of these skirmishes ignited when winning teams attempted to plant their flags on the rival’s turf, which exemplifies the heated nature of these “rivalry” games. It’s easy to classify such intense situations as expected.

However, a fortnight later, in a game between two of the fiercest rivals in sports, the outcome allowed one side to celebrate with a year’s worth of bragging rights, yet both teams exhibited honor. Navy triumphed over Army 31-13, but true to tradition, they each sang the other’s alma mater to the crowd post-game.

With the College Football Playoff beginning this weekend and emotions running high, Army and Navy remind us of what sportsmanship entails.

“After my final season, I was completely spent,” recounted Clint Bruce, a Navy middle linebacker in the ‘90s and a former Navy SEAL who aids veterans and their families in transitioning to civilian life. “I wasn’t at my best that game, and as I was being helped off the field, I expected it to be my teammates, but it was some of Army’s offensive line members.”

“We made a commitment to one another without realizing we would be facing greater challenges together.”

Bruce endured the pain of losing four times as a player, a sentiment echoed by Carlton Jones, a former Army running back, who joined Bruce to discuss civility surrounding their rivalry.

The forum, which took place in Washington, D.C., was facilitated by CBS broadcaster Brad Nessler in collaboration with the Rose Bowl Institute and the Reagan Foundation & Institute, both of which strive to foster unity in a divided nation.

Here are four essential insights they offered that can benefit any young athlete, coach, or parent.

Rivals on the Field Can Become Teammates in Life

Team spirit is a principle we can carry throughout our lives, especially when we reflect on the competitive dynamics we build with our adversaries.

Nessler: You dedicated nearly an entire year preparing to outdo each other for the Commander-in-Chief’s trophy. Once your football careers concluded, how did your interactions shift with Navy and Army players?

Bruce: Within the special operations sector, we operate in a collaborative environment, allowing us to interact with many talented players from Army. It’s an honor to work under individuals you’ve faced in the heat of competition. You quickly learn to trust one another, which becomes crucial in high-pressure situations, such as those on the battlefield.

Jones: I started my career as an air defense officer and collaborated closely with a Navy team while deployed, relying on their expertise with our operational platforms. While I initially had reservations, we quickly overcame them to focus on fulfilling our missions together.

Just Like Teammates, Rivals Help You Improve

Jones, who played for the Army during Operation Iraqi Freedom and is their second-leading rusher with a total of 3,536 yards, fondly recalls the camaraderie during preparations for games at West Point.

“I cherish practice more than the actual games,” he expressed, “because it’s where you engage with teammates, communicate, and encourage each other.”

Healthy competition with both teammates and rivals can stimulate growth in athletes and promote valuable life lessons.

Nessler: I’ve covered all major rivalries in various sports, but is this rivalry the best of all time?

Bruce: Show me a game where the players are prepared to sacrifice for their audience, and I’ll point to ours. Every individual on that field is committed to defending everyone watching. This rivalry stands out as distinctly unique.

Jones: You can’t completely grasp the essence of it unless you’ve experienced it firsthand. The academies’ demands are rigorous; excelling academically and militarily while balancing athletics is tough. There are moments you feel overwhelmed and want to give up. But the brotherhood with your teammates pulls you back in, offering support and motivation to push through. That bond makes the rivalry incredibly strong because we don’t just compete on the field — we strive together daily in all areas of our lives.

Bruce: And that’s a fundamental truth in life; the sooner you internalize it, the better. I often tell my daughters, “Endure the tough times now for an easier future; choose comfort now, and face the difficulties later.” We embrace the challenges early on, which often rewards us and those who look to us.

In sports, opponents are not enemies

Recently, renowned basketball coach Rick Pitino shared on X (formerly Twitter) that his St. John’s men’s basketball team will no longer engage in postgame handshake lines due to “multiple issues” he has observed.

Coach Steve: Should youth sports eliminate postgame handshakes? No, they should be valued.

The Army-Navy game mandates postgame interaction, where both teams gather to sing their respective school anthems, which can be a tough moment for those who lost, as they go first.

“It’s anger. It’s frustration. All these feelings hit you as you sit there singing first,” says Jones.

However, this tradition strengthens their rivalry and fosters a sense of community.

Nessler: A few weeks back, during the Michigan-Ohio State, Arizona-Arizona State, Florida-Florida State, and North Carolina-North Carolina State games, they were all about making their mark. I understand there’s a lot of youthful energy at a football match, and no team likes to see their logo disrespected, but that is vastly different from what happens at the end of your games.

Bruce: Especially in your final game, the significance and emotions are overwhelming. The reality of being part of something special and the sadness of never playing again hit hard. You hope that those who follow uphold the spirit in which you played. Personally, I know one person who doesn’t appreciate the Army-Navy game, and that’s my wife, as it falls on her birthday. After dating for two years and now being married for almost 27 years, she’s joked that “Army has ruined two of my birthdays.” I often tell her, “I’ll send you a cake. Just let me be!”

We may be rivals, but we aren’t enemies. Our “enemy” is a shared threat that unifies us. When there’s an external force that opposes both, it’s natural to band together. Our awareness of the institutions we represent and the nation we serve helps us to unite swiftly.

‘If you’re not ready to lose, don’t play’

Similar to politics, sports can be a place where one may mistreat others to elevate oneself, both verbally and physically.

In youth sports, how many times have you seen a rival coach bending the rules? Perhaps they call over a player to discuss strategy or manage to pressure a young referee into changing a decision.

Alternatively, consider being the one who points out an uneven gym mat that causes a basketball player to step out of bounds. A youth coach I know paused the game to give my team the ball when this happened.

That embodies the spirit of Army-Navy, and the values it instills.

Bruce: I’ve always advised my daughters: “You win, you lose, but getting beat is different.” Losing means you’ve failed yourself; being beat is simply that — being bested by another. Winning is what it is. Don’t lose. But if you lose and learn from it, that shifts from losing to being beat. If you aren’t ready to be beat, then don’t step onto the field — that’s what we gather on Saturdays to discover, right?

Coach Steve: How to exhibit grace in defeat, as exemplified by Caitlin Clark.

Nessler: I’ve seen teams exploit loopholes. Just this year, Oregon tried it. And I know there are some Michigan supporters here. Coach Belichick has just taken the North Carolina position, leading right back to Deflategate and Spygate. Gamesmanship and sportsmanship are two distinct concepts, aren’t they?

Jones: Gamesmanship is more about gimmicks. You’re pursuing a trick that will eventually be discovered, forcing you to start over. In contrast, true sportsmanship means doing everything correctly and consistently, eliminating the need for gimmicks or shortcuts. It simplifies things.

Nessler: Speaking of sportsmanship, was the recent presidential election the greatest display of poor sportsmanship ever?

Bruce: Love propels you further than hate can. Often, those I faced felt like competition, but it wasn’t hatred; they were just obstacles. I recall when I played in the NFL, some would claim, “You’re the toughest opponent I faced.” I assured them, “I didn’t hate you; I just saw you as a challenge.” The transformative power of love as motivation surpasses that of hate. While hate may spur you to fight hard against an adversary, love encourages you to rush into the fray to help a brother in need.